var msg = new Array(); Stamp = new Date(); today = (Math.floor(Math.random() * 22)) + 1; msg[1] = "I never said i was smart, I just said I was smarter than you."; msg[2] = "Bishop1786: I know. you're the kind of guy that would stand on a dog, killing it, to get a cat out of a tree."; msg[3] = "History repeats itself. That's the main thing that's wrong with it."; msg[4] = "Love is like a piano
Dropped from a fourth story window
And you were in the wrong place
At the wrong time
-Ani DiFranco: Two Little Girls"; msg[5] = "Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky."; msg[6] = "Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing
- Murphy's Military Laws #22"; msg[7] = "I like the pope; the pope smokes dope."; msg[8] = "The Hierarchy of Nerdom
Bottom: Liberal Artists
They talk to each other in English
Next: Foreign Language Majors
They speak to others, but not necessarily in English
Next: Arts, History, and Photography
They speak through some sort of visual media
Next: Buisness Majors
They have others do their speaking for them.
Next: Engineers, Biologists, Chemists
They speak in genes, reactions and equations, but at least they speak to each other.
At the top: Physics, CompSci, and Math
They just slobber and spit while writing things down.
"; msg[9] = "The significant problems we face cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.

--Einstein"; msg[10] = "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocre minds.

--Einstein"; msg[11] = "A dancing monkey is funny sight but a monkey that flies a spaceship is a technological achievement."; msg[12] = "Hardware is the part of the computer you can kick. Software is the part that makes you want to kick it."; msg[13] = "No, I will not fix your computer."; msg[14] = "You can do more with a kind word and a gun than with just a kind word.
  -- Al Capone"; msg[15] = "Japanese Politeness Levels

Politness Levels have their root in an ancient Japanese tradition of absolute obedience and conformity, a social caste system, and complete respect for arbitrary heirarchical authority, which many American companies believe will be very helpful when applied as magaerial techniques. They're right, of course, but no one is very happy about it.

Depending on who you are speaking to your politeness level will be very different. Politeness depends on many things, such as age of the speaker, age of the person being spken to, time of day, zodiac sign, blood type, sex, whether they are Grass or Rock Pokemon type, color of pants, and so on. For an example of Politness Levels in action, see the example below.

Japanese Teacher: Good morning, Harry.
Harry: Good Morning.
Japanese Classmates: (gasps of horror and shock)

The bottom line is thatPoliteness Levels are completely beyond your understanding, so don't even try. Just resign yourself to talkin like a little girl for the rest of your life and hope to God that no one beats you up."; msg[16] = "Japanese Grammatical Structure

The Japanese have what could be called an 'interesting' grammatical structure, but could also be called 'confusing', 'random', 'bogus' or 'evil'. To truly understand this, let's examine the differences between Japanese and English grammar.

English Sentence:
Jane went to the school.

Same Sentence In Japanese:
School Jane To Went Monkey Apple Carbeurator.

Japanese grammer is not for the faint of heart or weak of mind. What's more, the Japanese also do not have any words for 'me', 'them', 'him', or 'her' that anyone could use without being incredibly insulting (the Japanese word for 'you', for example, when written in kanji, translates to'I hope a monkey scratches your face off'). Because of this, the sentence 'He just killed her!' and 'I just killed her!' sound exactly the same, meaning that most people in Japan have no idea what is going on around them at any given moment. You are supposed to figure these things out from the 'context', which is a German word meaning 'you're screwed'."; msg[17] = "Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss putting in an honest day's work."; msg[18] = "I know that the power of prayer is supposed to be a good thing, but it always seems that when the Christians are praying for you, they're usually about a day short of commencing bombing."; msg[19] = "The Programmer's dilemma: 'Programming is like sex: One mistake and you're providing support for a lifetime.'"; msg[20] = "Having a high IQ is like owning a Jeep. You still get stuck, just further from help."; msg[21] = "Just because you`re paranoid doesn`t mean they`re not out to get you."; msg[22] = "'Backups are for wimps. Real men upload their data to an FTP site and have everyone else mirror it.'
-- Linus Torvalds"; function writeThought() { document.write("" + msg[today] + ""); }